Que faire quand vous avez envie d’abandonner l’amour

mis à jour le 10 mars 2020

médicalement examiné par: Karen Devlin, LPC

ce site web est détenu et exploité par BetterHelp, qui reçoit tous les frais associés à la plate-forme.

Source:rawpixel.com

Cestcertainly Ununderstandablereaction.,Yougothroughrelationshipafterrelationship,thinkingforsurethat,thistime,thisoneisTheOne.Butnope-youcatchhimcheatingonyou,oryourealizeyou’vefallenoutoflovewithher.Vous’rethedumper,thenthedumpee.Isrealloveevenpossible?

Atthispoint,youmaythrowupyourhandsandshout »que’sit,Igiveuponlove! »,Butyouareunfairtoyourself.Youmaywanttotakeabreakfromloveforalittlewhile,butyoudenyyourselfalifetimeofhappinessbyclosingthedooronlove.

BlamingYourself

Alotofpeopleblamethemselvesfortheirlovelivesgoingawry.Maybeit’sme,theythink.MaybeI’mjustnotlovable.,MaybeI’msoannoying,ormyinterestsaresouncommon,thatIwillneverfindsomeonewhocanbetrulycompatiblewithme.Butthisisaloadofmalarkey.

Thereissomeoneoutthereforeachofusifonlywecankeepthefaith,bepatient,andbediligentinoursearchandnotcompromiseourvalues.Becauselet’sfaceit,ifyoucompromiseyourvalues,youcannevertrulybehappyanyway.

Everyoneisvaluable,andeveryoneisworthyoflove.It’simportanttorememberthatbecauseifwebelievewearenotvaluable,thenwestartactinglikewearenotvaluable,andthenitbecomesaself-fullingprophecy.Whowantstospendtimedevelopingarelationshipwithacurmudgeon?,Thehappieryouarewithyourlifeandyourself,themorelikelysomeoneworthywillcomealongwhowantstosharethosehappyexperienceswithyou.

Youmaywanttomakealistofallofthethingsthataregoodaboutyourselfthatyoucouldalsooffertoanotherperson.Youcanalsomakealistofallofthevaluesyouarelookingforinapartner,attheveryleastasaremindernottocompromiseonthosevalues.Youmayalsowanttoconsiderseekingcounselingtohelpyouovercomepessimisticthinkingsothatyoucanbethebestpossibleversionofyourselfthatyoucanbe.,

au Sérieux…StopLooking

Itmaysoundlikeacliché,butt’s theTRUTH:youtrulydofindtruelovewhenyoustoplookingforit.Whenyou’redesperateforlove,peoplecanjustsmellitonyou.Ifyouinvolveyourselfinanewhobby,takeanewclass,orimmerseyourselfinanewsocialcircle,youaretakingcareofyourself,tendingtoyourownneeds,andyouareshowingtheworldthatyoudon’tneedamatetofeelwhole.

Source:rawpixel.com

Ifamatecomesalongthat’sperfectforyou,thenthat’sgreat,butifnot,thenyou’reembracingthesinglelifeandshowingtheworldthatyou’redoingjustfineonyourown.,Andit’snotlikeyou’llbetryingtoproveanythingtoanyone-you’llhonestlybehavingfunwithnewpeopleandlearningnewthings.Soyoutrulyareoccupiedandfillingyourlifeupwithlovelythingssothatwhentherightpartnercomesalong,you’llhaveplentyofgoodthingstosharewiththem.

Somethingelseimportanttorememberisthatthingsoftendonotturnoutthewayweexpectthemto.Wemaydatesomeoneandhavetheromancefizzleout,onlyforthatpersontoturnintooneofthebestfriendswe’veeverhad.Orwemayrealizethattheperfectpartnerwe’vebeenlookingforthisentiretimewasourbestfriendindisguise.,

KillTheTimeline

Manyofussetgoalsforourselves,likewehavetobemarriedby25,haveallofourchildrenby30,andbesettledinourcareersbythetimewe’re35.Butthetruthofthematteris,peoplearedoingthesethingslaterandlaterinlife,andthey’rehappierforit.

Morewomenaresettinguptheircareersbeforetheysettledown,leadingtohavingtheirfirstchildrenwellintotheirthirtiesandevenintotheirforties.Andyoucangetmarriedwhenever.It’snotarace,andthingsaren’tliketheyusedtobe.,Societyhasbecomemoreacceptingofcouplesmarryingaftertheyhavechildren,andyourbosswillprobablyloveyoufordevotingmoreofyourchildbearingyearstodevelopinghisbusiness.

mais sérieusement,don’trushthings.Rushingthingscanlandyouinarelationshipthatmayseem »goodenough »atfirstbutturnsouttobeanightmareintheend.Holdoutforsomethinggood,notjust »goodenough. »Itmaytakelongertoobtain,butyou’llbetentimeshappierandproudofyourselfforwaitingandfornotcompromisingyourvalues.Itsurebeatsrealizingfiveyearsfromnowthatyou’resaddledwithtwokidsanddependentonahusbandwhodoesn’tloveyouasmuchasyoumaylovehim.,

Thelastthingyouwanttodoishavetostaytogether »forthekids. »Holdoutforsomeonewholovesyou.Heorsheisoutthere.

LearnToEnjoyTheRide

Onethingaboutsearch Foranewmate Isthatit’s neverawasteoftime.Attheveryleast,youcancollectstoriestoturnintoanecdoteslateron.Andwhodoesn’tloveagooddatingnightmarestory?Bien sûr,itmaybeterribleatthemoment(howmanytimescanaguybringuphismotherinonenight?),butifitgivesyousomethingtolaughatlateron,thenitmadeeverythingworthit.

Source:pexels.com

Onamoreseriousnote,ifwegooutwithsomeonenew,andtheyrejectus,thenwecanatleastgainexperienceandstrengthfromtheencounterthatwecanthenbringtoanothernewrelationship.Plus,youcancongratulateyourselfforbeingbraveenoughtotakethatfirststepingoingoutandtryingsomethingnew.Itcanbescaryandintimidatingtomeetnewpeople,butgettingyourselfoutthereishalfthebattle.Theonethingitneveris?Awasteoftime.,

Vous ne seriez pas seul

Vous savez que vous ressentez le droit de ne pas vous sentir seul, et que vous le serez?Guesswhat-yoursoulmatemightbeoutthererightnow,thinkingthesamething.Maybeshejustgotjiltedbyyetanotherlover,andshe’sthinkingofwashingherhandsofthewholedatingbusiness.Butifshedoesthat,thenshe’llnevermeetyou.

Zut,itdoesn’tevenhavetobeyourfuturelove.Therearethousandsofpeople,atanygivenmoment,whoarecopingwithabreakupanddecidingwhetherornottogiveuploveforever.,Sogoahead,haveanotherhelping(orpint)ofyourfavoriteicecream,cryoveryourfavoriteromanticcomedy,throwbackanotherpintatthepub,dowhateveryouneedtodotofeelbetteratthemomentandrevelinthefactthatyouaremostdefinitelynotalone.

SecondThoughts

Thisisgoingtobesad,buthey,youneedtoknoweveryaspectofadecisionbeforeyoumakeit,andthisone’simportant.Youmaydecidenow,whileyou’reyoung,que’redone.Que’sit.Vous’regivinguponlove,andyoucan’tbeconvincedotherwise.Butthenthemonthsandyearsgobyand,beforeyouknowit,youmaybepastyourchild-bearingyearsandintoademographicthatfindsitmuchhardertomeetsomeonenew.,

Granted,therewillalwaysbethefailedrelationshiporthespousewhopassedawaythatmakesinglesavailableineverydemographic.Butitbecomesalothardertofindsomeonewhoisn’tmarried,settleddownwithchildren,orhavingdifficultylettinggoofthebaggagefrompastrelationshipssothatheorshecanmoveonwithsomeonenew.

Thisisnottosaythatyouhavetosettleforanyonewhocomesalongsimply,soyoudon’tendupoldandalone.,Butthisistosaythatbytakingyourselfoutofthedatingpoolforawhile,monthscanbecomeyearsfasterthanyouthink,andwhenyou’reolder,youmayfindyourselfgenuinelyregrettingthedecisionyoumadewhenyouwereyounger-andthenit’stoolatetodoanythingaboutit.

Source:pexels.com

Morethananything,givinguponlovecanjustleadtoyourbecominglonely,andwhyletallofyourexeswinthatbattle?Youshouldfightforyourhappinessbecausedammit,youdeserveit-especiallyafterkissingsomanytoads.Statisticssaythatyouwillfindthatprinceeventually,evenifyouhavetokissafewmoretoadsfirst.,

Peopleneedpeople,andinavarietyofways.Mostofushavefriendsandfamilytoturnto,butwealsoneedtheemotionalconnectionthatcomeswithromanticloveaswell.Itmaynothappenrightawayasitdoesinthemovies,butit’ssomuchbetterwhenitdoesn’t.Becausethat’swhenyoufindtruequality.